John & Pat embrace the new regime by constantly talking while saying nothing – also by coming up with creative new ways to screw the lower classes!

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John & Pat drink a toast to the dearly departed of the previous year. Unfortunately, they both try to drink actual toast and end up choking to death in beautifully thematic fashion.

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John & Pat pick their best pop culture items of the year. If only they were picking the incoming cabinet, this might be meaningful instead of just masturbatory. But why change the format now?

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The holiday season is upon us, so instead of letting crazed shoppers and awful relatives bring your blood pressure up, allow John & Pat to do it instead with their half-assed attempt at entertainment.

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John & Pat are both feeling under the weather, but decided to give you a podcast anyway out of the kindness of their hearts. Sure, there’s no topic and they’re really more lazy than sick, but still – shouldn’t you be sending them money?

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Nothing. It’s a theme Pat & John have explored before, both on the podcast and in their mental states. They once again stare into the void and the void stares back. Then the void takes them out for beers and they watch a VHS copy of Caddyshack. The void’s not so bad.

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